Being Present

It’s effortless to tell people that they need to be present for important milestones and people’s lives. It’s not easy to always make that a reality. Life is messy, and it isn’t effortless. Our lives get inundated from day to activities that prevent accomplishing specific goals. Those who have children consistently challenge themselves to ensure they are there for their child/children and come through for work or both. Their bosses expect them to get their job done, and their children expect them to be there for them whenever they need them. Society tells us that children are only children one time in their life, so we need to be present for their growing up. Society doesn’t tell us how to make sure all the bills get paid without losing our minds when the economy is stifling. When people find themselves forced to work two to three jobs to make ends meet, it becomes even more difficult for that person or persons to be present for their kids.

It also becomes challenging to be present and relationships when both parties are being pushed to every end of the spectrum that they can be. When one or both parties find themselves expected to do more and more in different aspects of their life, they may find it challenging to be there for that partner. I recently saw it change someone who had gotten married, and you could tell this person was unhappy. They’re not being present for many different areas in their life, and you can know that they’re trying to balance many other things, but it’s taking a toll on that person. And it doesn’t matter what we do in life as long as we are OK with our choices. But it saddens me when I watch this person and see how their body language is drooping, and they are having difficulty moving forward.

And then I think of my friends who are in relationships that are controlling. Significant others expect them to be present with them at every opportunity and begin we are particularly and begin to put them on guilt trips for needing to come through for other people. There’s a difference between being present in a relationship and a working partner with somebody and being controlled. There are enough people, places, and things that influence us in our lives – we don’t need to add to that drama. Friendships and relationships are hard enough. But this topic made me think about how we can all be present for each other and different areas of our life? Here are some helpful tips that I found online.

Smile.  Start your day with a positive note by smiling and feeling happy. Each day brings in new opportunities. When we are in any relationship, smiles can be one of the most welcoming or frightening experiences we have, depending on how they present themselves.

Appreciate every moment of today.  Consider every day as a new beginning. Accept the good and bad happenings of that day. Do not accuse yourself if anything goes wrong. No time frame is a guarantee that we will either enjoy or dread.

Clear out unnecessary thoughts.  None of us need drama or clutter. When we allow our thoughts to become scattered, we don’t have a clear head. Discard the excess and enjoy the pertinent things life has to offer.

Love your duties.  Love your work and daily routine. Do not try to survive on negative thoughts about your work. When you love what you do, your physical and mental health gets stronger. You are more of a joy to be around. This item can translate into your other relationships as well.

Forgive people who have hurt you.  Do not harbor bad feelings for anyone. Forgive them and move on in your life. This item can be challenging if you are the type of person that holds grudges. The thing to remember is to stop dwelling on what happened with those who caused pain. You can’t change the past, but you can grow from those lessons. You might be preventing yourself from experiencing true happiness because of the bitterness towards those that hurt you. Please don’t give them that power. Process what happened and move forward. Being kind to yourself also means cutting the cord on those who caused drama. People should keep drama for television and movies, not for living their best life.

Stop Worrying. The only thing worrying will do is create wrinkles and more health issues if you do it enough. You won’t be able to enjoy your day or have peace of mind. Don’t allow worry to rob you of your happiness.

Shut Off Electronic Gadgets.  This item is one of the most challenging tips I have faced. I find myself glued to my phone and other electronics. I can give them up, but it isn’t easy for me. I make a living on them, so it’s not only tricky, but I find it strange for me to give them up. I’m constantly looking for ways to extend my education, and my gadgets allow me to continue learning. Sometimes, when I’m out with friends, I have to put my phone up and not let myself look at it while I’m with others.

Take Regular Breaks.  If you don’t take regular breaks, it becomes easy to have too much clutter occupying your mind. Taking frequent breaks helps charge your batteries.

Practice Mindful Awareness.  When you practice mindful awareness, you become more in the moment, which can be crucial to helping you change your patterns and behavior for the better.

Be a Good Listener and Speaker. When you become a better listener and speaker, you can learn more information and education with better content.

As you find yourself immersed in various relationships and opportunities, I hope you allow yourself to be present in healthy conversations and situations. Do the things you need to do to make yourself happy and surround yourself with people who challenge you. I hope you all have a wonderful day and can be present with those who push you to be the best you can be in life.

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