Being Nice isn’t Always Nice

I do my best to be a nice person, and many people take advantage of that kindness. This past week, I wrote about a woman who essentially stole from our company and had a family member step up to pay her bill. The same customer who stole from us emailed me and said her code wouldn’t work to get in the gate. Keep in mind that this woman never responded to all the various attempts we made to reach her. She abandoned her parking space and had no intention of returning until her account became current. I have a long waiting list for parking spaces and units. We are sold out and have been for months. When I emailed her back, I informed her that we moved her out of her space because she abandoned and forfeited that space. Yes, her family paid, but we had no idea what was going on, and after waiting 48 hours after payment with no word, we moved her out. She showed up as I was leaving last night and then left when the gate wouldn’t let her in. She’s dealing with a domestic violence set of problems, and while my heart aches for her, I can’t read minds. Had she communicated with me, things could be different. I probably would have kept her parking space for her but stealing from the company as far as the parking rights angered me. I do my best to come through for people, but her actions are not ok. I had to stand firm with her, and while I wouldn’t say I like to turn people away, when the rules are broken, especially to that degree, I can’t allow them to continue. I needed her to understand that I knew she broke the rules, and I wouldn’t allow her to continue creating mayhem along the way.

The most complex part of not losing all of our niceties is when people push our buttons and make us feel like doormats; it creates this instant reaction of going into witch mode. There are feelings of confusion as to why people do things that most of us don’t understand. It seems like there are always people who try to make us feel bad when going through drama in their lives. Sometimes, it makes others feel better about themselves when they can take out their anger on innocent people.

There is a massive difference between being nice and being a bitch or an ass. We may all struggle when we don’t know how to handle situations, but the key is staying in control and keeping our temper in check. Getting agitated and angry makes us do things that we may regret later. I’ve had a lot of users in my life, and I got taken in by their broken promises. But one thing I know is that if I conform to being a permanent bitch, they win. I can be nice and still stand my ground. The main thing is finding that perfect balance. While life may not always be like a balance beam, there will be times when life seems unfair. Don’t give in to the temptation of anger. The next time someone does something to get your feathers ruffled, remember that they may ruffle your feathers, but you are the one that can soar above their actions. Have a wonderful weekend, everyone.

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