Relate

It’s not hard to relate to things people are going through if you’ve experienced those issues before in your life. For example, I used to think that Fibroids weren’t that big of a deal until I had them myself. Now I understand how painful they are and the complications that can arise. If you are a woman and have never dealt with that pain and frustration, be grateful. Fibroids, endometriosis, and other abdominal issues for women are no cakewalk. Sometimes abdominal pain makes life so frustrating and challenging that most men can’t begin to fathom how much pain women who suffer from this deal with regularly. I can tell you from experience fibroids are no joke.

Another example I never knew until I went to work for Habitat for Humanity was what it was like to be laid off from a job until I experienced it through them. At the time, they were cutting $200000 from the budget. My position was one of the casualties of that job. The supervisor I had at the time did not handle social skills well. Because she commented the next time I got laid off from a job, I could expect this. I got angry with her because she insinuated I would get let go again. I’m not perfect by any means, but I did an excellent job for them. I wasn’t lazy, and I was pretty sharp. I wore a lot of hats in that job. Everyone had to start doing for themselves when I left. Not long after leaving the company, I found out my dad had cancer. God works in mysterious ways. Because I was laid off, I could take care of my father. And while I took care of dad, it turned out that my former supervisor died from a brain clot or brain aneurysm; I’m not sure which. She was young and in the best shape of all of us at Habitat. My heart went out to her son, who was left alone.

I can relate to those who have gotten their hearts broken. It’s not easy to pick up the pieces of your heart when it’s shattered. Everyone tells you to keep going and move on, but they don’t tell you how you’re supposed to pick up the pieces when your world feels like it’s crumbling all around you. Everybody tells you to move forward, but yet you’re still stuck in neutral because you’re trying to figure out how to move ahead when you can barely get your foot to move, one foot in front of the other. We all deal with heartbreak in our ways. The hardest thing is putting on a face that shows the world that you’re fine when you’re breaking inside. Sometimes the mask that we put on to the public can’t begin to convey the scars forming deep within our soul. I can relate to having my trust shattered by a person I trusted with my life. I can remember finding out that my former significant other was having affairs all along, and it left me feeling like I was inadequate all the way around.

I can even relate to bad decisions made in life. The thing I’ve had to learn is that all of us have situations that we’ve had to learn to connect. There will always be situations and circumstances similar to what we experience. Then we have to determine how we’re going to handle that information. If you’re one of those who like to fix things as I do, you need to learn to let people make mistakes. You might be able to relate to them, but if you do everything for them sooner or later, it’s going to backfire. The hardest thing I have to do is to step back when I see somebody going through something that I did, and there’s very little I can do to prevent it. I don’t wish heartbreak on anyone, but it is necessary to grow.

Maybe that’s one of the reasons that I believe so strongly in God. When I’m going through a hard time and don’t know how to express myself, I know that God is showing me that others can relate to what I feel because he always puts people in my path at the right time who have gone through those same experiences. The hardest thing I have to do is listen instead of talk. If you can’t relate to what a person is conveying to you, try empathy and compassion. It will go a long way.

The actions that we give to each other are also ways to relate. When people see kindness, they are more prone to reciprocate kindness. When they see anger and frustration, they’re more inclined to deal with things with much tension. Actions become mimicked because people can relate to how a person is feeling. And there are times where those actions can be contagious. If this pandemic has taught us anything, we all can relate to being tired of a pandemic. We all got sick and tired of being cooped up in our homes. We got tired of shutting everybody out to stay safe for those who had to keep working as I did. We could relate to what other people were feeling because we dealt with it ourselves.

I don’t know about the rest of you, but I could relate to the increased cost of living. It seems like every company is going up in price, yet companies like the one I work for don’t want to adjust their pay. They still live in the mindset of 15 years ago, yet the bills keep increasing while the income stays at a lower rate. I hesitate to jump ship and go to a different company for the simple fact that if I do, I may not be able to continue working for a long time. I say this because a lot of companies are hiring, but they’re not keeping the people that they’re bringing on for very long. Job security is very shaky at the moment. I can relate to people’s fear of changing jobs in this economy.

I hope you look at issues with your friends and peers that you can relate to over the next few months. All of us have fought hard to stay healthy and positive when it seems negativity is everywhere. But if we continue to use empathy and compassion, the things we can relate to will help us in all aspects of our lives. We don’t have to let the world run over us to utilize good judgment. May your Wednesday be full of relatable moments. Have a great day, everyone.

3 thoughts on “Relate

  1. Walk a mile in my shoes!! I used to think some people are just over exaggerating things until I’ve had to go through the same thing – relating – it shuts you up and humbles you very quickly!

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