Everyone needs a space that is designated for them. It can be their sanctuary. The world has so many issues that affect all of us differently. We may be dealing with a variety of emotions. We can be overwhelmed, excited, and confused. Frustration or anger can become prevalent. Divisions among peers and families are a reality. The last few years have been a firestorm for people. Both sides of the political party are angry with each other. There is a call for unity, but it will take years to heal if the nation ever does. Each side feels wronged. There are no easy answers to fix the hatred that has been spewed. If anything, the actions that have occurred have made it more necessary to have a personal space to recollect ourselves and regroup.
Maybe you have an apartment, a house, a trailer, or a roof over your head, and you have a hidden space that is your sanctuary. Many people in cities love to go up on their buildings’ roofs to see the lights and catch their thoughts. They may star gaze or listen to the traffic and noise below them. It might be a calming presence in their lives, and if you do this, bravo.
I have a local park that is my refuge. When the world is overwhelming me, I escape there. I take the trails along with a good friend, and she and I walk for miles. We walk and talk. It gives both of us a chance to let out emotions that have festered. We sometimes cry when we walk because of the hurt we encounter and the disappointment we have felt because we allowed others to use us. We’ve gotten better about this. But those trails have a lot of hills. We love to say that we “hate the hills but love the results.” There is a lot of truth in that statement. We have it timed to know when we can use the restrooms along the way and when we won’t use any facilities. COVID has made things challenging but not impossible. If anything, it’s been a solid reminder that we all need personal space.
I have a good friend of mine who used to tell me that I’d fall too easy. I think he’s right. I’ve always been the type of person to wear my heart on my sleeve. It’s difficult for me to walk away from people that I see potential in. I’ve had to learn to get harder with myself and others. The most difficult aspect of that journey is learning to walk away and utilize my personal space to benefit. I have many people in my life who do understand why I’m choosing to go on this journey alone. Part of it is I’m finding myself. The other part is I don’t want to have to answer to someone else until I can know myself well enough to know the strengths and weaknesses I possess. I’m well on my way to discovering those attributes.
If I’m around people who act like alphas, that tends to be a huge turn-off. The reason? If those around you have to get territorial when it isn’t warranted, chances are, those same people are going to be controlling. They are not going to respect your personal space but rather demand you respect theirs while they take control of situations. This isn’t always true, but I’ve watched men and women disrespect others and invade their personal space.
Not everyone will disrespect you. Many will understand if you take time, you can sort out whatever life is throwing at you. Don’t let the distractions of life keep you from continuing a self-discovery. We change every day. That’s why it’s important to maintain a personal space so that we can be able to stay in tune with ourselves and what’s important in our lives. Before we can share anything in our lives, we need to accept ourselves for who we are and not be ashamed of the extra weight or the scars, or the physical and emotional wounds.
As you embrace that personal space, don’t be afraid to reach out for help if you feel overwhelmed. Professional help can be one of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves. Many people are dealing with mental anxieties more than ever today. There is no shame in saying that we need to make sense of issues in our lives. Cherish your personal space. Make it a priority. Respect others’ space even when they don’t respect yours. They are probably dealing with the drama of their own making, and the last thing you need is to get caught up in other people’s drama. You can be an ear if they want to talk, but for at least five minutes in a day, take the time to use your personal space to your advantage. It can make all the difference in your life.